Fishy Tales

we have had numerous fish tanks ranging from 6ft by 5 ft with the stand right down to a diddy tank which is the hospital tank, we also had both tropical and marine fish, although we have had major problems with the marine tank after buying an infected fish, even though it was quarantined when we first got it and separated for a month it showed no sign of illness so i thought it was safe to put in the main tank, big mistake, we have lost over 10 fish now, using all the medications suggested but i have to admit should we lose the lot, I’m not going to rush out and get any more marine fish for a while, very pretty but hard work as its a lot of water testing etc. and the novelty has worn off with the boys now as their new Nemo killed the other fish lol We had to downsize on the tanks as they were taking over the house.. This is not a big house by any means and sharing it with over 500 other residents and their aquatic surroundings was not working.. besides him indoors decided that he wanted reptiles as well.

We Made it eventually.

Well he called Friday evening and said he only had £25 and that was all he had at the moment. hey it was better than nothing. and Yes after juggling finances around a little we made it to silverstone.  the kids loved it.. well the boys did anyway. I don’t think Tammy was that impressed but then she is bored with anything and all the time. Must be a teenager thing lol

I have made a good start on my Christmas present shopping now.  Although I have to say I have no idea what to get the boys  or Allan for that matter…. I’m not going to go mad this year and hopefully avoid anything that comes in 1000′s of pieces like meccano or Lego.. we are still picking up last years all the time,

Mind you before Christmas Is Birthdays and today the 22 Is Andrews Birthday.  you know what was weird is that I actually had to sit and think for a second to work out how old he was.  18  yet another milestone I will miss.. Happy Birthday son… I do think of you every day……..

After Andrews Birthday is Tamara’s we the important birthday anyway… in between is Allan’s  mums or has hers been you know I’m not sure and i don’t care ha ha

Alex’s birthday is the 21 of December. I do feel sorry for him having a birthday so close to Christmas. Oh and I almost forgot mine is in November.. OMG I will be 48    I’m not old……  but I will be making some life changes then…  More to be revealed later on lol

anyway Its 12.30am and I guess I should go to bed as I have to get Alex up and ready for school tomorrow…  Oh and one more thing.. I have been talking to Susan again  I did block her last year on fb because IMO she was messing with guys lives and not playing fair but she sent a friend request and a message and I have replied… lets hope I haven’t done the wrong thing.,

A Tad on the annoyed side!!

totally pissed off now putting it mildly

not a word..   Allan’s even sent a text to him this morning and not even a reply

I am more than furious I am livid..

Never again will I do anyone a favour again..

I have two little boys who were looking forward to going to silverstone and now we cant go..  one day is too little notice now sort it out.. have tickets but no cash to get there..   If we dont hear anything by tomorrow moring (friday) i will have to cancel the kennels for the dog (cant leave him on his own all day as it would be a long day) and we will lose the money we have already paid out for that.


Great weekend or not?

Sorry I’m still on a downer, I feel like I’m doing nothing but moaning,   This weekend is the Renault world series of motoring at Silverstone.  I’ve had the tickets since June,  We went when it was at Donnington for a weekend and had a fantastic time, last year we missed it and this year I was determined to go even if it was just for the day.. and now that looks like its out the window,

One… funds very short and yes we still haven’t been paid back the £48… I managed to get petrol in my car and rake through the freezer so if we get it back it would cover our petrol for the day to Silverstone.. but as usual the one place I really want to go to I cant because I have done a favour for someone else  and its cost me and they haven’t turned up with the money.

I Originally ordered 8 tickets as well just in case my dad or one of the girls wanted to come..

Actually the more I think about it the more I’m Fuming now…

Im still having one of those blah days.


I know I shouldn’t rant all the time but I’m getting to the point where I feel like the whole world is populated by idiots and selfish bastards who just use you.

After my last posting about my step daughters schools, I did indeed go to the shoe shop first thing in the morning the next day and get her a pair of decent school shoe’s as it goes while I was there I managed to get Alex his wellies for the winter they had one pair left in his size so thankfully that’s the last thing he needed now out-of-the-way.  Anyway we got back and lo and behold in the afternoon we had another visitor., my other step daughter…  (the sister) and would you believe it her shoes are fucked as well, the sole was hanging off them.. how the fuck can she go about college like that… As soon as Allan got home I had a quick word and he stayed with the boys and Tammy while I took Amber up the town to get her some shoes as well,  she likes the cheaper dolly shoes so got her a couple of pairs…. it should last her a little while..  I understand people don’t have the money these days.. and lets face it the only reason we had a few quid spare is A. I budget for the back to school stuff long before the summer holidays and B we gave up smoking.   If her parents (mum and step dad) are that short of cash that they can’t afford to send the girls to school and college with new clothes or at least something not falling to pieces.  then why the fuck don’t they ask for help its Allan’s daughters after all,  A simple we can’t afford to get new bits at the moment can you get them its your daughter… yes fine… oh then they would maybe have to explain the year and a half he didn’t see the girls.  not going into details here but if we had known at the time what we know now about a certain visit they had from social services during the time we didn’t see the girls.  and possibly the reason why so we didn’t find out about it. I think things would have been very different.

Rant 2 today…  Obviously after the shoe shopping trip this weekend money is tight this week,  A friend asked me to pick him and a friend up from the airport when they return from holiday. ok I say., the flight gets in at Gatwick about 6.30am, we can work our way around it.  Jo a friend can take Alex to school, Allan can take Tamara to school in Faversham.. I don’t want him doing the airport run as it would mean him being up about 4am and as he has his driver assessment in the afternoon i don’t want him tired. (more about that later)  Any way there is some Diesel in the land rover but because at the time I didn’t know how much was in it and how far you get on about 1/4  of a tank and  I know it’s a long way to Gatwick and not exactly a cheap car to run I put another £10 in.. I drive to Gatwick get there for about 5.45am (I allowed time in case i got stuck in traffic) I don’t know my way round Gatwick that well so I found the short-term parking parked there and got to the international arrivals bit..  met the friend we get back to the car  he had already say he would pay the diesel and parking anyway it was £8 for the parking..

(the look of shock on his face should have told me there was going to be problems)  we drive home.. now 3/4 of the way home the red light goes on in the land rover and im starting to panic thinking we are going to run out on the M25.. we get to the A249 exit to detling hill and I’m thinking at least there is a garage there at the top of the hill,   Bugger that garage was closed to I mange to get to the garage by us at bobbing..  I think right I have still got to take his mate over to Sheerness and get back to take him home up the town so I had better put another £10 in at which point he says shall he pay for that.. I’m thinking  ive already put £10 in so he owed me that plus what was in it plus parking.. fuck it if he thinks he is going to get away with just a tenner he can fuck off.  so I say we will sort it out later on as he was going to be coming round for a coffee once he has been to bed and slept for a few hours  anyway, I get back after the run and say to Allan how much was in the land rover and he says he put £20 in so all in all it had used £40 worth of diesel so plus the £8 parking we were £48 out of pocket.  but hey we can cope because we should get the money back straight way that afternoon and then ive got the money for the school runs etc to put in my car plus shopping as that’s the money we used to pay for it.

He comes round that afternoon and looks totally shocked that it came to £48  hey its a bloody land rover I had to use as your cases etc wouldn’t have fitted in my car.  he says his friend is paying half so if we get the money off him and he will pay his half.. err hang on I have met his mate twice.. I doubt I will see him again for ages and I will be fucked if  im going to drive over the island to pick up the money..  bollocks to that .. you pay it and get the money off your mate yourself…    he then says is it OK if I give you the money tomorrow or the next day as ive only got a tenner in sterling at the moment.  ok I say.. thinking I hope I have got enough petrol to last in my car and bits in the freezer we can have for dinner.  anyway that was Monday and its now Wednesday and still no word from him, thankfully my child benefit went in this morning so I had some to put petrol in my car…and pick up some milk and bit.. but because of the shoes and bits we are skint at the moment and need the £48 asap.

This guy needs to live in the real world he is in his 40′s still lives at home with his mum and dad and has no expenses apart from his diesel to drive around and is on major benefits..  we have a house and 2 kids at home and others to pay for not to mention the pets  in other words we can’t afford to just forget about £48 this week.  On top of it all I’m really pissed off because the one thing I did ask as a favour was that he pick me up a lousy bag of cheetos and bring them back,. oh he didn’t get near a supermarket for the last couple of days  before they came home, well sorry but if it was me I would have got them first and put them away..FFS he was gone for two weeks. yes I know im sounding like a baby but hey im totally fucked off and usually I do loads of favours for people and get nothing in return this time I ask for one little thing that cost cents and yep shit out…

On top of all that I remembered something I promised to do  as a favour for someone else and had forgotten about so feel bad about that but they had said no rush and only if I got the chance so I can still do it..

Am I pissed off …You bet I am..

I need to vent… I need to shout… I need to scream!! I need to remember and respect!

Those people who know me well know that I don’t suffer fools gladly and that I also have a very short temper at times.  I call a spade a spade and yet I will do anything I can to help anyone who needs help.

Today I picked up my step daughter from school for the weekend… We got home and I noticed that her shoes were falling apart… Now I had said to her a couple of weeks ago had they got her new uniform etc and I was told that she had some new shirts and that they were going to get her jumper when the weather gets colder..  no new blazer etc  I asked about shoes and was told as she had new ones in July she didnt need any… fair enough I remember she did have some new ones only a few weeks before the end of term.

Yes she got her new shirts… YESTERDAY which means that she went to school for 3 or 4 days in old and very stained shirts…  I noticed her shoes and they are fucked.  Im sorry but who In their right mind sends a child back to school on their first day.. in the September term in shoes like this? :(

Before the Summer Holidays I had, had to sew up the entire lining of her Blazer as it was all ripped and every seam was undone. I had used every stain remover known to man to remove stains that were all over it from leaked pens etc. thankfully it was black so not to noticeable. however it was snagged in places.  defiantly  in need of replacement how ever the shop in Faversham where you get the school clothes were out of stock of shirts jumpers. (yes her jumper was not only to small but also snagged) and Blazers and I was told they didnt stock the pe kits and that you had to get them from the school.   great i thought her stuff that was getting to small and falling to bits would have to last till the end of  July when she broke up…. no they have sent her again this term.. wow two new school shirts at the grand old cost of £8 each..    If I had known I would of put some cash aside the last couple of weeks and kitted her out myself.  As it goes tomorrow We are going up the town first thing to get new shoes…. I had already bought her a new jumper a few weeks back   and next week hopefully will be able to afford a new blazer and the week after I will go up the school to get her some new pe trousers as hers which were ripped at the bottom last July have now been cut to get the ripped bits off shame they are now about 4 or 5 inches to small.

I know its not cheap kitting kids out for school but I have always got my kids complete new uniforms.  usually 2 jumpers, 2 trousers/skirts/ at least half a dozen shirts if they were in high school or a dozen polo shirts if in the primary school each… not to mention new PE kits.. trainers, plimsolls and of course bags and shoes.  and coats… I have just bought the boys new coats and their old ones still fitted them, to be honest i could of got away without buying them one this year but i like them to go in new. their old ones can be used for playing in the garden with or snow if we gets some :)

At one point years ago I had 3 kids in high school and two in primary school all needing new uniforms and yes I had to budget and get a little at a time but i got it all before they went back in September.

I do understand that money is tight but come on you know that uniform is needed so what would it hurt getting bits a little at a time.. and if they couldn’t afford it why not ask can we get something or help towards it.  Allan has got off  lightly over the years he doesn’t mind paying towards things the girls need if they would tell us. Saying that the only reason we can afford to get her shoes now and other bits is we gave up smoking.. yes the pair of them still smoke despite her having asthma according to her doctor anyway..

Anyway like I said… first thing in the morning its up the town to get some new shoes…

Tomorrow or should I say today as we are now 9/11 is the anniversary of the terrible acts of terrorism on the world trade centre and aircraft’s in the USA…

Lest we never forget!

A little info for those who may not know fact’s and figures.

Casualties of the September 11 attacks

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Casualties of the September 11 attacks included a total of 2,977 fatalities[1] (excluding the 19 terrorist hijackers): 246 on the four planes (from which there were no survivors), 2,606 in New York City in the towers and on the ground [2], and 125 at the Pentagon.[3] All of the fatalities in the attacks were civilians except for 55 military personnel killed at the Pentagon.[4] More than 90 countries lost citizens in the attacks on the World Trade Center.[5] In 2007, the New York City medical examiner’s office added Felicia Dunn-Jones to the official death toll from the September 11 attacks. Dunn-Jones died five months after 9/11 from a lung condition which was linked to exposure to dust during the collapse of the World Trade Center.[6]




At the time of the incident, media reports suggested that tens of thousands might have been killed in the attacks, as on any given day upwards of 100,000 people could be inside the towers. Estimates of the number of people in the Twin Towers when attacked on 9/11 range between 14,000 and 19,000. NIST estimated that approximately 17,400 civilians were in the World Trade Center complex at the time of the September 11, 2001 attacks.[7] Turnstile counts from the Port Authority indicate that the number of people typically in the Twin Towers by 8:45 a.m. was 14,154.[8]


Only 14 people escaped from the impact zone of the South Tower after it was hit and only four people from the floors above it. They escaped via Stairwell A, the only stairwell which had been left intact after the impact. No one was able to escape from above the impact zone in the North Tower after it was hit, as all stairwells and elevator shafts on those floors were destroyed. After the collapse of the towers, only 23 survivors who were in or below the towers escaped from the debris, including 15 rescue workers. The last survivor was pulled from the rubble 27 hours after the collapse of the towers. A total of 6,294 people were reported to have been treated in area hospitals for injuries related to the 9/11 attacks in New York City.


World Trade Center

An estimated 200 people jumped to their deaths from the burning towers (as depicted in the photograph “The Falling Man“), landing on the streets and rooftops of adjacent buildings hundreds of feet below.[9] To witnesses watching, a few of the people falling from the towers seemed to have tumbled or leapt out of broken windows.[9] Some of the occupants of each tower above its point of impact made their way upward toward the roof in hope of helicopter rescue. There was a plan to use helicopters;[citation needed] however, it wasn’t used due to the intense smoke; the roof access doors were locked, Port Authority officers attempted to unlock the doors; however the system would not let them, and thick smoke and intense heat would have prevented rescue helicopters from landing.[10]

Cantor Fitzgerald L.P., an investment bank on the 101st–105th floors of One World Trade Center, lost 658 employees, considerably more than any other employer. Marsh Inc., located immediately below Cantor Fitzgerald on floors 93–101 (the location of Flight 11‘s impact), lost 295 employees,and 60 consultants. Risk Waters was holding a conference in Windows on the World at the time, with 81 people in attendance.[11][12]

John P. O’Neill was a former assistant director of the FBI who assisted in the capture of Ramzi Yousef and was the head of security at the World Trade Center when he was killed trying to rescue people from the South Tower.[13] An additional 24 people remain listed as missing.[14]

The average age of all the dead in New York City was 40.[15] The dead included 8 children: 5 on American 77 ranging in age from 3 to 11, 3 on United 175 ages 2, 3, and 4.[16] The youngest victim was a 2 year-old child on Flight 175, the oldest an 82 year-old passenger on Flight 11. In the buildings, the youngest victim was 17 and the oldest was 79.[17]


Of the 125 victims in the Pentagon, 70 were civilians and 55 were military personnel.[18] Lieutenant General Timothy Maude was the highest ranking military official killed at the Pentagon.[19]

By the numbers

Fatalities included the following:

  • Everyone aboard the four planes (no one aboard the hijacked aircraft survived)[20] This includes (not counting the hijackers) 79 passengers and 11 crew members aboard American Airlines Flight 11;[21] 51 passengers and 9 crew members aboard United Airlines Flight 175;[22] 53 passengers and 6 crew members aboard American Airlines Flight 77;[23] 33 passengers and 7 crew members aboard United Airlines Flight 93.[24][25]
  • 2,606 in New York City in the towers and on the ground:[2]
    • This includes 343 New York City Fire Department firefighters, including one FDNY Fire Chaplain, Franciscan Fr. Mychal Judge[26], 23 New York City Police Department officers, and 37 Port Authority Police Department officers.[27] Casualties of the 9/11 attacks also included 15 EMTs[28] and 3 Court Officers. Approximately 2,000 first responders were also injured in the attacks.[28]
    • 1,366 people died who were at or above the floors of impact in the North Tower (1 WTC); according to the Commission Report, hundreds were killed instantly by the impact while the rest were trapped and died after the tower collapsed (though a few people were pulled from the rubble, none of them were from above the impact zone).[29]
    • As many as 600 people were killed instantly or trapped at or above the floors of impact in the South Tower (2 WTC). Only about 18 managed to escape in time from above and in the impact zone and out of the South Tower before it collapsed.
    • Of those who worked below the impact zones, only 110 were among those killed in the attacks. The 9/11 Commission notes that this fact strongly indicates that evacuation below the impact zones was a success, allowing most to safely evacuate before the collapse of the World Trade Center.[30]
    • A K9 dog named Sirius.[31]
  • 125 in the Pentagon[3]

Non-American casualties

Aside from the approximately 2,669 United States casualties, 310 foreign nationals (excluding the nineteen perpetrators) also perished in the attacks, i.e. just over 10% of the total number of deaths. The following is a list of their nationalities (not accounting for at least some cases of dual-citizenship). By far the foreign country with the largest loss of life was the United Kingdom, with 67 deaths (including the overseas territory of Bermuda). India had 41, South Korea had 28 and Canada and Japan had 24 each. Colombia had seventeen and Jamaica, Mexico and the Philippines had sixteen each. Australia and Germany had eleven each, while Italy had ten.

Country Total fatalities
Argentina 4 [32]
Australia 11
Bangladesh 6
Belarus 1 [33]
Belgium 1
Brazil 3 [34]
Canada 24 [35][36]
Chile 2
China 4
Côte d’Ivoire 1
Colombia 17
Democratic Republic of the Congo 2
Dominican Republic 1
El Salvador 1
Ecuador 3
France 3
Germany 11
Ghana 2
Guyana 3
Haiti 2
Honduras 1
India 41 [37]
Indonesia 1
Ireland 6 [38]
Israel 5 [39]
Italy 10 [40]
Jamaica 16
Japan 24 [41]
Country Total fatalities
Jordan 2 [42][43][44]
Lebanon 3
Lithuania 1
Malaysia 3
Mexico 16
Moldova 1
Netherlands 1
New Zealand 2
Nigeria 1
Peru 5
Philippines 16
Portugal 5 [45]
Poland 1
Romania 3
Russia 1
South Africa 2
South Korea 28
Spain 1
Sweden 1
Switzerland 2
Republic of China (Taiwan) 1
Ukraine 1
Uzbekistan 1
United Kingdom 66* [46][47]
Bermuda 1
Venezuela 1
* Excluding Bermuda

Forensic identification

Ultimately, 2,752 death certificates were filed relating to the 9/11 attacks [48], as of February 2005. Of these, 1,588 (58%) were forensically identified from recovered physical remains.[49][50] The Associated Press reported that the city has “about 10,000 unidentified bone and tissue fragments that cannot be matched to the list of the dead.”[51] Bone fragments were still being found in 2006 as workers prepared the damaged Deutsche Bank Building for demolition.

Thoughts of Patricide ok I maybe Joking about the Patricide But!!!!!!!

He is driving me nuts… who you ask… the answer is My Dad.

Don’t get me

wrong I love him to bits but there are days when I really dont need him round the house just sitting th

ere in the way. or sitting out on the bench with the dog.

Today I wanted to have a blitz on the house. In all honesty with the boys being off we have been out a lot and have more important things to do than spend all day cleaning  so it had got a bit of a dumping ground for everything. instead of being put away. I had said that I was going to tidy up and dropped so many subtle hints its not true….

So… This morning my friend from a couple of doors up Jo took Alex to school and I thought right I can get on with things now. I had loads of stuff sorted but it was at that messier stage before it gets tidy stage and yep In walks the old man and plonks himself down in the arm chair I wa

s just going to move to clear out underneath..   some of Allans bits that were on the stairs I had stacked up against the back door. guess where he wanted to go  yep out in the garden  arrrggghhhh!!!  All stuff was moved and he went out there… and sat on the bench just playing with the dog..   i try and get on with things inside then he comes in..  I end up saying can he move as I want to do some bits and he decided he will go home, see you tomorrow he says… I remind him that it would be best to leave coming around tomorrow as its Ali’s first day of school is tomorrow so its going to be a hectic day trying to do some more tidying up, getting Alex to school, then coming home, later on after lunch taking Ali to school and then picking up Ali at 3pm and then getting Alex…  oh right he says so you dont want to pop to B&Q with me in the morning then.  err no I’m busy says I

right he says… going out the door… see you tomorrow.!!!!   AAARRRGGGHHHHHH!!!  Chances are very good he will come round in the morning… If not he will be sitting there when I get back from the school run with the boys…….