Strange Discussion on Secrets……..

We well by we I mean Allan and I were watching one of the new two and a half men episodes the other night… (ok not that we intentionally watch it just that there was sweet FA on the tv and we put the comedy channel just on  just for a laugh really. Anyway… one of the guys
*you can tell I don’t watch this on a regular basis because I have no idea what their names are*
was watching a Porn that was on the tv and recognised it was his girlfriend in it..    Anyway.. of course confronting her. she admitted that it was done over 20 years ago.. when he asked why she hadnt mentioned it she said… its not the kind of thing you bring into the conversation..  anyway this lead to her asking him if he had any deep dark secrets and of course his list went on and on.. 😆

Both Allan and I looked at each other and I said.  So have you any Secrets from the past….. and he sat and thought Nope…  Now bearing in mind I don’t think he was  exactly the most worldly wise of people in his younger years….  I can actually believe him .. Bit of a mummy boy… virgin until his 20’s I would say… At least… In fact although we have never really discussed it I bet you could count the number of women he has been with on one hand.
Anyway…

He knows I have lead a rather chequered  past to say the least.  lets just say I could of written the words sex, drugs and rock and roll… 😕
I admit I was an early starter so to speak……. and yes    I made the odd mistake…….. Lets just say the person who should of been my first wasn’t … but he was my second
Now the strange thing is they say you never forget your first time……. Actually that’s not true  I cant even remember the guys name….. or the circumstances that lead to it to be honest… this is where the drugs come into it.. I confess also that spending the majority of my teen years in the states….. did contribute to my drug use..  weed  smoking roll ups and using a bong was a regular pastime and yes I know I was stoned off my head the first time… and the fact that it was some real good stuff that he had brought round… something i wasn’t used to.. I found that out the day after , as he had left it behind so of course I was going to smoke it. A friend came round and we rolled a joint.. she had her half first and man was she wasted.. much more than normal, and that when I realised how good that shit was 😆
So I count my second as my first………… 😆 Yes I can remember that……  Yes I can remember him…  Yes he was special…… Yes I messed up……. I went off and “Slept” for want of a better word with his friend  until I went back to the states and then realised my mistake as the guy was a user, a tosser, a player, and slept with my *female*  friend… Karma kicked in straight away there..
(nothing has changed though out my life )

and Yes Again I can confess you would need at least two hands 🙄 to count the amount of men I have done the deed with so to speak..  and confession time.. yes I have *shock horror* slept with a couple of women as well.
Anyway I digress  as I was saying Allan knows I have had a checked past….  He knows my entire history, he knows about Michael, He knows about my swinging both ways in the past…..   He knows How crap my marriage was.. hell he was around for the last two years of it when he was living with my friend, before I separated from my ex..  So yes he knows me , warts and all……….
So the question came, Have I hidden anything from Allan.  Do I have any secrets from my past.. that I haven’t told him..  Well the answer is No… To be honest… There is nothing I have hidden from him… Ok there maybe things I haven’t mentioned  purly because they have never come up in conversation and I had forgotten about them.  but should the conversation ever get round to something that jogs my memory then yes I would say something ..  There is nothing I have done that I couldn’t tell Allan about..   Nothing to Hide… why because I don’t have a reason to hide anything  It was a long time ago……

Hell I even have a couple of ex boyfriends on my facebook account..  One I speak to, and comment on his wall,  Actually mentioning that  its funny because I noticed this evening that the status’s he had put and I had commented on replied to.. nothing private or personal etc.  just  … Music lyrics from LMFAO songs had all been deleted… Maybe he is ashamed  or just pissed off because it was me who commented lol  oh well…
He obviously feels the need to hide things from someone… Thankfully that’s something I don’t have to do………   Allan knows I talk to people on fb so I have nothing to hide from him when anything is posted on my wall or he sees me posting on someone else’s…

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