The battle against those annoying furry things that seem to invade every house in the village throughout the year!
what am I talking about…. Mice… Bloody Mice!!
The problem is we live in the country and we have a farm opposite the road from us and huge fields so they come into the houses mostly when its cold or harvest time when the combine-harvester is driving around the crops making them homeless
Now despite being a terrace house in the middle, usually we don’t get them, I think the fact that we keep snakes helps, Kate Next door is always inundated with the damn things and so is Jo’s next door to Kate and I have no doubt Joyce gets them on the other side of us but we seem to escape getting them, I never find any evidence no matter how hard I look, and of course we never see or catch any in traps left out
but not this time.
Last week we heard a scream from next door as apparently one of the little fuckers ran across Kelly’s bed (Kates 38 yr old still living at home with mummy’s daughter)…… Mind you I think its the only thing that has dared to go near her bed so not sure why she is complaining lol
So that giving us the heads up,
When I went shopping a couple of weeks ago I had picked up some lazy cow multiseeded bread mix for the bread maker and put it in the top cupboard… yes the top cupboard that i couldn’t quite shut the door on because of the cake boards in there.
I noticed there was some flour on the counter top and when i opened the cupboard door there were two beady little eyes staring back at me before they ran off in the shelf.. The little fucker had chewed into the bag of flour to eat the seeds making a mess everywhere!
of course I did want every self respecting woman does when there is actually a male in the house… I screamed for TBO aka Allan to get his arse in the kitchen straight away because he was going on a mouse hunt! I pointed him in the right direction and retreated to the other side of the kitchen so he could proceed with the eviction!
He started to empty the shelf and lo and behold there was the little cretin stuck in the corner trapped so he grabbed it by the tail and took it into the garden to dispose of it in a rather inhumane way… this is where you think to yourself
one down 50,000 to go 🙄
At this point we then start to empty every cupboard in the kitchen, clean everything out… empty every counter top and scrub and bleach that.. we then start moving furniture around in the front room and start looking for evidence of infestation. yep we have fucking mice… we found one of TBO’s missing slippers hidden under the sofa and inside it was a chocolate wrapper chewed
THE WAR IS ON!!
I go up the town and pick up bait traps, mouse and rat killer and loads of glue traps…. and we start putting it down..
Now bearing in mind that my precious Mindy could still be alive roaming the house I really didn’t want to go down the poison route but needs must.. I’m not holding out much hope for her anyway.. the mice are way to big for her to survive on and eat as she is only small or maybe I should say was.
Anyway a couple of days pass and the back bedroom starts to have that distinct smell of decaying body despite searching high and low we cant find it
… now normally when you put mouse killer down the little fuckers will run away to die so this rotten decomposing ball of fur had probably feasted on poison from next door and come our way under the floorboards to die.. so that’s 2 down now !
yesterday the same rotten smell started coming from our bedroom, Allan goes to investigate and finds one on top but just out of view of one of his weights that had been stacked by my side of the bed… now im wondering if this is why my chest had been bad the night before.. he takes it downstairs and disposes of the rotting corpse… sprays air freshener and opens windows.. 3 down..
unsure if there are any more in the kitchen I left some flour on the counter top sprinkled so I could see the marks of any little footsteps and leave out some chocolate on the side..
Dont believe all this bollocks you hear about mice loving cheese… the love chocolate better… nope all intact.. fingers crossed they are out the kitchen…
her the reason I am writing this blog at this time in the morning is because having woke in the night about 2.30am coughing I came downstairs and decided after a warm drink to just sleep on the sofa for the rest of the night..
and about 5 am I am woken by scratching. I check Isabella formally known as Gwen’s cage and she is soundo in her bed so its not the hamster………
I look under the wall unit and lo and behold one of the little bastards is stuck to the glue trap we put under there… YES!! another of the little fuckers is caught… I deal with this one myself and am now waiting to inform the head mouse catcher that I have put another glue trap down and he needs to check the others he placed around as I have no idea where half of them went.. and also check the bait stations and top them up.
We will win this battle against the little buggers.. I am not against mice as a pet but not free range in my fucking house!!
If they want to stay warm build a bigger nest in the field but piss off out of my house!!
Apparently Field mice are a delicacy in Malawi bet you didn’t know that 😆