He is driving me crazy but Hey he’s my dad!

This last year or so My dad has become really quite frail for want of a better word.
He has always been obnoxious, bad-tempered, built like a brick shit house, but the one thing he never really has been is frail.

ok so he is 80 but up until last year he certainly had his wits about him, he certainly got about, lets face it we went to castles and all over the place with him, ok the steps to the tower at Dover castle where a bit of a challenge for him in the last couple of years so I have been the one to take the boys up to the top but other than that he has managed to get about fairly well,  That is up until about 9 months ago when we were at Hornbys taking the boys for one of their usual trips there and he had a bit of a wobble on with his legs..but then we had walked a long way that day as we had been somewhere else previous to that.
That was it.. he decided then his legs were packing up, within a few weeks decided that he would be better off in a wheel chair for any distances..  Yes we had one (which was my mums years ago when she broke her ankle) which we lent out to various people when ever they needed to borrow it, so we got it out and we used when we went out.. now he has always been big… 6ft 6 and big built so not an easy person to push around to say the least.  

Last year when we were booking up for Duxford airshow he decided he wanted to come with us and we warned him then it’s a huge place to go around.. 
He then decided that he would get himself a scooter to use as he was at the point now where he was using the ones in the supermarkets instead of walking, the furthest he walked was his flat to the car,  the car to our house, he got himself a scooter, not a lightweight one but the heavy-duty one, yes it comes apart in as far as the steering folds down and the seat comes off and folds down to fit in the boot of a big car or landrover but it weighs a tonne and is hard work putting together..  

And that’s it… everywhere we go he uses that now… even in the supermarkets that have their own because his is more comfortable,   Im really struggling to get it in and out of the car and sort it.  my back kills me and my elbow needs a support now as the slightest thing even lifting a kettle is now painful.

Anyway, my dad went to his doctors to get a repeat prescription for his diabetic medicine and I told him to mention that his legs had swelled up so they gave him more pills for that.   his doctor was away on new years eve and the doctor he saw immediately wanted him to go for an ECG and Chest xray.. (yes he has been puffing and panting when walking just to the car and back but we put that down to the fact that he has made himself bad now because the less he does for himself the less he can do)  he refused to go to the Main hospital at Medway because my mum passed away there due to negligence (proved)  so we called up Memorial the local cottage hospital and they said come along at 11.30am and he could get his xray done and then the ECG.. He wanted me to come with him so said he would come and get me and I could drive there , I told him to come around for about 10.30am and we could leave about 11am its only a ten min drive up the road.
what time does he turn up in the morning.  7.39 am of course we were still in bed… He actually had the hump because he had tried to ring since 6.30am… well we were asleep.  to say I was not impressed is an understatement.  Being full of cold I haven’t been sleeping well and not only that we didn’t go to bed until gone 2 in the morning.

Anyway we get up the hospital, they do the xray  results in 10 days.
we wait for the ECG as they don’t even start doing them until 12 noon.   got the results from that.. I take him and the results back to his doctors… he moans like hell about having to wait around all day to the receptionist.. saying they should do them from early in the morning.  Anyway the receptionist then says that the doctor is still away and for him to call back in a few days to make an appointment and she didn’t see what the rush was about to get the tests done straight away…  Hmmmm obviously she has more medical knowledge then the locum.
So here we are now waiting,  The one thing I did notice when he was having the tests done is how much weight he has lost… the skin is hanging off him… we have a friend who had a stomach op to lose weight and he has loads of lose skin well my dad looks like him, no wonder the old fart stinks so much with all those folds of skin.  it’s actually quite worrying. I know he eats hardly anything nowadays.. which is not good because he is diabetic. but then he did need to lose some weight but not loads like that..

He drives me up the wall turning up each day  especially early in the morning but then on the other hand He is getting older and with the exception of my brother.. who is a complete and utter selfish tosser who I have as little to do with as possible.. he is all the family I have now.

I’m seriously wondering now if he has lost the will to live as he just seems to fall asleep most of the time.. he also rambles.. now I watched my mum suffer from Alzheimer’s and she got to the point where she didn’t even know who I was. but she started off forgetting little things.. and he is like that now.. repeating himself again and again.. can remember things from years ago but forgets what he did yesterday.   Of course he wont hear a word about it..

Hmmmm Worried.Com


2 thoughts on “He is driving me crazy but Hey he’s my dad!

  1. Sorry to hear about your Dad’s deterioration Ann, and sorry you have to wait so long for his results too. It sounds like you might have some difficult times ahead, even if he is not ill, it’s still tough when you have an ageing parent 😦

    • Thanks, it feels a bit like déjà vu as I know my brother wont be there to help out after all as he told me when my mum was ill and I was caring for her… He has a life

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