I have found the main drawback to getting married is changing my name over,
Ok I changed my name on facebook straight away but that was it, I never actually thought about anything else until the other day, I applied online for my D1 to change my driving licence and the form arrived the next day so that was posted off on Friday along with an original copy of my marriage certificate. (thankfully a name change is free for driving licence as originally I thought it would be at least £17) , along with my prepayment certificate for prescriptions (they accept a photocopy) as we have to pay for them as well and as I get so much a month it was cheaper paying for a yearly certificate.
So Tomorrow I have the fun job of going around the town with a copy of my marriage certificate and an original, for council tax I need to show the original, for the electoral roll, they want a copy but I have to provide it.
The dentist (already done as I had to take Alex there on Friday to get his braces checked. just took my word for it. but the doctors want me to go in with the original copy of my marriage certificate.
I have filled in my V5C for my vehicle registration but not sent it off yet as I need to call the insurance company on Monday and find out if I have to send a copy of my marriage certificate off first or I may find myself not having full cover if anything happened because my insurance and log book are in different names. although I will tell them my licence has already been sent off. I have just called my life insurance company and they need a photocopy sent to them. again if I hadn’t of informed them, any claim may have been invalid.
The amusing one is the school’s bearing in mine they have called me Mrs, and used the boy’s surname for years. now want to see a copy of my original marriage certificate to change my name on their files.
I have to take an original into the housing association on Monday as well to show them.
the banks want to see the original, I am with British gas and they took my word over the phone so my bills will be amended but the water company want proof.
HMRC take my word for it online which is the one I assumed would want a copy of the marriage certificate. hence why I got 3, one to send off for my driving licence, one to HMRC and one to keep to show anyone who needed to see it.
I won’t bother with my mobile/cell phone as I am on GiffGaff PAG
That leaves catalogues to be done, credit cards to be done. apparently. I need to call the catalogue so I can do that on Monday. although the credit card’s I will call them on Monday and find out what I need to do.
Hopefully, I can sort out all this tomorrow and that will be done, once and for all,
My passport has expired years ago, and I doubt I will be needing it for quite a while so I will deal with that when the time comes,
I know one thing, If we get divorced I am keeping my married name lol there is no way I want to go through all this again.
oh and one more job I need to do when we can afford the £10 each for new ones. Apparently, I need to legitimise the boys and get new birth certificates for them so it shows their parents are married. this was something the registrar mentioned when we got married and she asked if we were both the boy’s natural parents. I had never even heard if it.. so anyway after searching the net and trying to think of everything I could. I have put a checklist below. it may help someone else who is as clueless as I was.
- Passport, Brides can get this done before their wedding. All applicants can collect a form at most post offices and must apply for a new 10-year passport.
- Car registration. Complete section 6 of your V5C Registration Certificate and return.
- Electoral roll. Apply at your local electorate office. Some areas allow name change by mail.
- Breakdown cover, car, appliances etc.
- Housing if you rent
- Local council. For council tax. Call your local council office to learn the procedure.
- Utilities (gas, electricity, water)
- Communications (home phone, mobile, internet, pay TV)
- Mortgage, credit and store cards, building societies, investment accounts
- Insurance (home, contents, health, life)
- Memberships (frequent flyers, loyalty, shopping, professional, sports, alumni)
- Health (doctor, dentist, specialists, prepayment plans )
- Property titles (not essential for marriage or reverting to maiden name)
- Online (Facebook, Ebay, PayPal, LinkedIn)
- Professionals (accountant, solicitor)
- Other (subscriptions, real estate office, etc)
- Catalogues and online shopping
- Update your will
- Library card
- Driving license can be updated by mail. Pick up a D1 ‘Application for a driving license’ form at most post offices.
- Bank accounts and cards. Most banks with large branch networks need your original proof of name change in person at a branch. Contact smaller banks directly to learn their procedures.
- HMRC can be done online. You’ll need about 25 minutes and some reference numbers (ie: National Insurance, PAYE or tax payer reference numbers) before starting the process.
- Your employer. Speak with HR, your boss, IT or your office manager. You may need your email address, directory listings and business cards updated.
This is what a big girls blouse looks like, *the dog, not Allan😂😂* (although there are moments 😂) the stupid dog hate’s, the cold, rain, dark etc. with it pouring down most of yesterday or wet and cold he would hardly go out, so last night,😣 he decided that he needs to pee, not once but about 5 time’s, 😠making pathetic stupid whining noises, of course at night it’s dark so I then have to step outside the back door and walk about 2 yards into the patio,😨 to trigger the security light to get it to turn on. I swear if I didn’t love him so much I would have shut the stupid dog out there all night.#worsethanhavingababywakeyouupinthenight so today I am going to get revenge, every time the fucker goes to sleep I am going to wake him up!!!!😈😈😈
Every year I go online and buy wristbands for Adventure Island, they are cheaper in February and Ali gets in free anyway with his blue peter badge, they last until the end of the year, so I take them in the summer and usually again at Halloween, This time as we had a spare wristband and I doubted we would be going again before the end of December I said we would take one of the boys friends with us, now usually we take Alex’s friends but this time I said we would take Ali’s friend, he had moved to Gravesend this time last year although Ali has kept in contact with him, via Xbox and phone. so we picked him up on the way and off we went. the boys, as usual, had a great time, Ali has no fear on rides at all, although he does have to take his glasses off in case the fall off. he thinks its great as he can’t see how high things are etc. So here I am freezing while they have fun, oh well its worth it 🙂 the great thing about this time of year is all the decorations are out so it gives a lovely Christmas feel, although to be honest, I am dreading Christmas at least I don’t feel as guilty now as it took a lot of bribery to get Ali to pose by the Xmas decorations. his wording was, I can’t wait until the end of December.
After a mad rush this morning to get the boys to school (for once I slept, unfortunately because I am so used to being awake at 4am I didn’t bother setting my alarm, maybe it was because I knew Allan was off work today so I didn’t have to get him up at 4.30am my body clock decided to go slow, but I didn’t wake up until 8am, bearing in mind Alex leaves the house at 7.45 for school, this is not good. one very mad rush and a quick call to his school to say we would be late in, and we left the house at 8.30, the usual time for me to leave to drop Ali off, so dropped him off and then went on to take Alex to school, only 20 min’s late. Must admit I am so glad it’s Friday, it’s been a long week, my back is still hurting a lot and I can’t stand for long. Payday today and although it’s a short month because of the week off Allan has had, we treated ourselves to a KFC for dinner, that is it, we did nothing else but sit on the sofa all day in between school runs, I let Allan have a lie in and we sat and watched some recorded shows we had on the tivo box so we could clear space, the plan was to empty my car, it is still full off all the create’s of stuff for decorating the hall for the wedding reception and to go shopping, neither of which happened. so all in all a very lazy day, even the dishwasher and washing machine didn’t get loaded. my eye is getting worse now and I am beginning to look like something from the zombie apocalypse. lol
Hard to believe that we have already been married over a week, time seems to have gone so fast.
Woke up this morning, and full of cold, did the school run and just as I got in I had a major sneezing fit and got a weird headache and a pain in my eye, I didn’t think anything of it until Allan got home in the evening when he asked what I had done to my eye. when I went to look in the mirror I saw what he meant, it’s all bloodshot in the corner, it feels ok now but looks quite weird.
After Approximately 14 years we have finally tied the knot, we had a lovely day and the weather was beautiful for us, the sun was shining, we married on my birthday and all I can say was it was the best present every, after the wedding we went and had lunch with our friends and the boys who were all our witnesses, it really made the day that the boys could sign as witnesses as well, then in the evening, just us and the boys went out for a meal, then home to reflect on the day and have an early night as we went out the next day to see some friends in London and spend the day with them in Greenwich and also go to the Emirates stadium where Arsenal are based. I have finally recovered after a very hectic weekend now, we were half an hour late for our own wedding reception , I had been at the hall setting up all day while Allan was cooking all the food for the buffet, the bar was an hour late turning up to set up so it meant I couldn’t leave the hall until they turned up, by the time I got home and Allan went to the hall to get the food there, he got back and we quickly changed and got back up there we were late. his lovely sister managed to get the buffet sorted for us lol we had a lovely time despite me being in chronic pain as I put my back out moving the stage blocks, tables and chairs etc so by the time we got to the reception I could hardly walk 😦 but hopefully, the hall looked nice enough. I was a bit annoyed for Allan though as he invited all his work friends and others and not one turned up out of the 50 odd he invited. and quite a few who had RSV p’d to say they would be there either told us they couldn’t make it on the morning of the day or just didn’t let us know at all, which really pissed me off, to be honest, as we had catered for about 150 people anyway here are a few pictures of the evening. oh. and it took up 4 hours to clean up yesterday so again my back was bad, ended up having to go to our local hospital yesterday afternoon and was given some strong morphine pills. so by the time we got home they knocked me out and I was asleep most of the evening, the poor boys just helped themselves to leftovers from the buffet for dinner. must cook a good meal for them today lol
It is not the kind of sadness where you cry all the time but more like the sadness that overwhelms your entire body leaving your heart aching and your stomach empty, making you feel weak and tired and yet when it comes to sleep you find it impossible because the sadness is in your dreams too – it is a sadness you can’t escape from, I know I am supposed to feel happy, we have so much to look forward to but I can’t help thinking that the most important people in my life won’t be at my wedding. and as much as my dad was a royal pain in the arse sometimes, well all the time tbh, I miss him, I miss the older kids, and I miss my friends who have passed away. in an ideal world, they would all be with us to celebrate. I can’t help thinking that had things turned out differently, they would all have been there to help us celebrate because we could have got married years ago,
The other thing that makes me sad in a way is the Wilkinson family will have one family member left with the name and that is my brother. who has no kids and never will. we are the last of the Wilkinson line. Ironic really considering I was the only girl born into the Wilkinson family for over 500 years, you would think being all males born into the family the name would be thriving, but none of the Wilkinsons had big families, just one or two boys but the two world war’s and cancer had taken their toll on the male member’s and the family line and name, has dwindled down to my brother and me and with regret in a way, none of my kids had the Wilkinson surname. It was one of the reason’s I never officially took on my married name the first time around. but this time, I want to have the same name as the boys and Allan, I think the only reason I am changing my name is because my dad is gone now. with the exception of all my children, the last 30 plus years, have been a challenge and at times a living hell, like a nightmare that never ended until I met Allan. we have had our up’s and down’s as all couples have had but we have come through it and it has made us stronger, and so here we are, A new start and a new name.
As they say, things can only get better