Saying goodbye to watching class plays forever. Thank f**k

Today I saw my last ever class play, Ali is yr 6 now and once they go up to senior school they don’t do the class play.
Ali hate’s them with a passion, they are not for him and,to be honest, they have made his life miserable in weeks leading up to them, this one being no different.  if you have read my pink/purple blog you will see that I won the battle. and Ali is dressed in blue.   He never said a word, and with the exception of this picture which I took at the end, he wouldn’t even look forward.  even here he wasn’t happy with having to turn around as there was still a lot of mum’s in the hall.  people, Ali doesn’t do people!


From these picture’s you can see that while other kids may love the opportunity to take part in play’s and enjoy doing them.  Ali doesn’t.  


refused to look as he does his part and  holds a banner. he is supposed to be facing front.


Walks off after a few parents laugh because he won’t look forward after prompting from his teacher. 

Now some may say that he should have to take part in these things, but if they knew the meltdown’s we have about it, if they knew how upset this makes him, how unsettled, then maybe they would understand.  
I have never missed any of his class plays or Christmas plays. In fact, I have never missed any of the kid’s school productions. This was the first one ever that his dad missed due to work.  we have always gone and watched both boys, but I have to say.  I am so glad this is the last school class play I will ever have to go and watch.   Now we just count down to the Christmas play,  hopefully, now his teacher will understand the anguish Ali goes through and will think twice about what part he is put in.  
This evening he had a smile on his face for the first time since they started practicing the play because he knew it was over.  

PINK/PURPLE *The joys of being a parent of an autistic child*

Ali (10) came home with a note from school about clothes needed to be taken in for a class assembly ,  he was not a happy bunny and is refusing point blank to dress up, he hates dressing up, in the past it has been a nightmare, and for the last couple of years we haven’t had to worry about it as he has always been a narrator on the school plays which meant he could just wear his uniform.  
for years he insisted on wearing the same clothes as his brother when not at school and it’s only over the last year or two that I have been able to dress them in different clothes, even now he hates new clothes and usually Alex has to wear something first before Ali will wear it.  

When Ali is at school he is usually in his element, everyone dresses the same, it’s a routine he thrives on.. until it comes to Christmas plays and class assemblies. he hates them with a passion, they can usually convince him to take part but only if he doesn’t have to dress up.  

So back to this note:

Now it would be hard enough for me to convince Ali to dress up at all, but to have purple/pink clothes.  Seriously?? The kid may be only 10 but takes men’s 2XL is 5 ft 11 with size 11 feet, pink/Purple is really not his colour!

There is no way I am going to go out and buy this kid anything in pink or purple,  His sister’s clothes wouldn’t fit him as they are both smaller than him even though they are now both 20 and over.. *Happy 20th Birthday to my step-daughter today* 
I am not a pink person myself so that is out of the question, but I do have a purple T-shirt that has a skull on it, so worst case scenario I’m guessing that will have to do along with his black jogging bottoms.
Well I will send the clothes in but I will let Mr Denney deal with the massive meltdown that is inevitable when it comes to convincing Ali to wear it lol

What is it with school’s and their demands for clothes for plays etc.
over the year’s I have had to provide pirate clothes,  roman gladiator , harry potter, knight, Arab and other outfits,  everything green for green day …  oh and brown..  
thanks to ebay, the pirate, harry potter, knight and gladiator costume’s and others, were found, bought, worn for about an hour and now  all sit in a box on top of the wardrobe in my room,  never to be worn again, well they wouldn’t be by the boys as they are too small now.  but in total, I would say there is about £100 worth of dress up outfits there. 

As for the green day, well Primark ended up being the destination to get a green T-shirt and jogging bottoms, again to be worn for one day and never again because I don’t for some reason dress my kids in green. 

Brown! Now that was a nightmare to find..  again it was eBay and brown t-shirt, does anyone dress their kids in brown???

All I can say is good luck Mr Denney, both this time and at Christmas if you are brave enough to insist Ali dresses up again and roll on next September when Ali starts senior school as we will no longer have this dress up crap ever again. 

My Baby is 9 today……..

Seriously, where has the time gone……… it only seems like yesterday that my waters went three weeks before his due date and I went into total panic, the idea of history repeating itself scared the hell out of me….

but 9 years on and here he is… 

Minutes old

Minutes old

9 years old

9 years old

So for his birthday we had a treat and went to pizza hut after school,  Am I the only one who has kids that do stupid things?



I always said that the boys couldn’t have a phone until they were 10 but as Alex is on his 3rd phone now since he was 10,  first was useless and cheap, second.. expensive and dropped and screen shattered. and 3rd was cheaper getting a second-hand Samsung s4 for him off eBay than it was getting the screen fixed on his other phone…..  

And the fact that Ali had no idea what he actually wanted for his birthday and didn’t really care,,,,,,, I decided that it would come in handy when he goes to a friends house, yes he has one friend. and when we go to pontins so I can check he is ok when they are out and about on site… We decided to get him a Nokia Lumia for the pure fact, his laptop is windows 8 and he is used to using a tablet so I thought this would be the easiest phone for him to use……. and I put him on GiffGaff as well so when his credits run out he can still call me for free and send me texts.   he was happy as a pig in shit especially as I managed to get a blue one, his favourite colour. 

Next year will be the killer when he hits double numbers………. 

Things are slowly getting back to normal, whatever normal is.

As I said things are slowly getting back to normal,  Allan went off to cub camp last weekend with Ali, the pair of the had a great time, I’m never sure who is the biggest kid.

Ali at cub camp

Ali at cub camp

As I had been stuck indoors all weekend and the boys were on half term this week I decided we needed to go out or should I say I needed to go out, so we had a few day trips. 

we took the boys and one of their friend Joe to leysdown the local seaside resort about ten mins drive away if you don't get stuck in traffic getting on the island.

we took the boys and one of their friend Joe to leysdown,  the local seaside resort about ten mins drive away if you don’t get stuck in traffic getting on the island.

Wednesday was our invicta arachnid meeting where we had a great talk by hazel from wildwood which is a nature park, the talk was on the dormouse and she brought one to show us. oh and we cleaned out in the raffle, we won £10 and this bag of goodies, not bad for £3 worth of tickets.

Wednesday was our Invicta arachnid meeting where we had a great talk by hazel from wildwood which is a nature park, the talk was on the dormouse and she brought one to show us. oh and we cleaned out in the raffle, we won £10 and this bag of goodies, not bad for £3 worth of tickets.

Thursday we decided we would take the kids to wildwood as we have a season ticket, so we took the boys, and their friend Josh and Shelby with us.

Thursday we decided we would take the kids to wildwood as we have a season ticket, so we took the boys, and their friend Josh and Shelby with us.

PicMonkey Collage 4
we also took the boys with their friends to the local park, one day.  and below that are some pictures of my handsome grandson 🙂


We had a lovely meal out at the local pub which is only a few mins crawl I mean walk home 🙂

All in all it has been a really nice relaxing week,  it really does make a change getting out and about again after not being able to go anywhere because of going back and forth to the hospital or clearing my dads flat or not being mobile because of my broken foot.  
I have an appointment at the fracture clinic Tuesday and I am hoping they say I can take the air cast boot off officially, to be honest I have stopped wearing it indoors as I would rather put up with the slight pain then be clumping around with it, and I have never worn it at bedtime.  

It’s now 3.36am Friday night/ Saturday morning, I have Darren my grandson here for the night as I babysit him most weekends and we are planning on going to a boot fair in the morning/later on so I had better try and get a couple of hours sleep.  

I will sign off with a couple of silly pictures,  one when I was cutting Ali’s hair and decided to take a picture before I shaved the last bit off, like you do and a picture I found on my phone which Alex had taken of himself being silly 

PicMonkey Collage 2

So much to catch up on

I’ll be honest so much has gone on since last year that I’ve not been in the frame of mind to do anything for months. the run up to Christmas was hectic, between school activities, working, courses and the usual preparations
But Christmas itself was lovely. We spend half the day with my dad over for xmas dinner. Little did we know it would be the last. And then in the evening we had friends over with their little girls and we had a great time-sharing presents. Boxing day was the same. Hectic and a time for friends.  After a couple of false Alarms in the following week. My gorgeous grandson was born on new year’s day. I was so honoured to be there at his birth. Wow things are so different from the other end of things.  After that things went downhill for us.
The head gasket went on Allan’s car and it was declared deceased and of course just after xmas finances or lack of them meant that we couldn’t afford to fix or replace it. Ali got chicken pox and had spots everywhere so missed nearly two weeks of school and then at the beginning of Feb my dad wasn’t feeling well. So went home early after his usual visit in the morning. I spoke to him in the evening and he said he was feeling  a bit better. The next morning we hadn’t heard from him by 10am so went round the flat to find him collapsed on the floor. This resulted in him being taken to hospital. For the next 5 weeks I spent everyday bar three going back and forth to the main hospital in Medway which is about a half hour drive away. and then he was transferred to St Thomas’ hospital in London. So I spent another 3 weeks going back and forth to London, sadly the day before his birthday he passed away. During the whole time he was in hospital i was still having to go around his flat everyday to feed his fish and check mail etc. So three days before his funeral I am boxing stuff up as we had to clear the flat and I  trip over his mobility scooter and hurt my foot. Somehow after sitting down for an hour. I decided to man up and managed to drive home in the landrover.  The next day I was still in a lot of pain so off we went to the hospital to find out I had broken my foot in three places and cracked my heel.  So they put a cast on and told me to go back to the fracture clinic in ten days. So I ended up going to the funeral in my dad’s wheelchair. Thankfully after the ten days when I went back I had the choice, another cast for 6 weeks or an Air boot for 10 weeks. I chose the boot as I can at least take it off at night. As we arrived home I went to get out of the car and as I was getting my crutches out of the back of the car Allan shut the door on the car and caught my fingers in it.. resulting in a broken finger as well,  you have to laugh., anyway back to the boot.  At least  I take it off at night and every time I sit down although I’m not supposed to really. only to have a bath and at night after the first two weeks but of course I pay no attention to that lol . Unfortunately, it means I can’t do much in the house so we are sitting with boxes of my dads bits everywhere. Our bedroom is a store-room as I can’t get upstairs anyway (we are both sleeping on the sofa) and that’s about brought me up to date. I went back to my maths course on Monday afternoons last week  ( I’d  not been since Jan) Allan had to drop me off and pick me up as I can’t drive. But other than that ive not done anything else apart from numerous visits to solicitors to sort out my dad’s affairs with my brother. So that’s about it. Nothing else has gone on really.  So basically with the exception of Darren my grandson’s birth. This year sucks big time.

me holding Darren minutes after he was born

me holding Darren minutes after he was born

getting Darren dressed for the first time.

getting Darren dressed for the first time.

broken foot with the cast

broken foot with the cast

my Air boot until the end of June at least

my Air boot until the end of June at least

broken fingers it could only happen to me.

broken fingers it could only happen to me.

A devastating day

So much has happened since I last posted and I have been both busy and lazy. I have had highs and lows and maybe I will be able to do a full update sooner or later but Today I had to make to most difficult decision I have ever made in my life and say my final goodbye to the only man who has stood by me through thick and thin, who I admit in my younger years, I have probably put through hell and back quite a few times, but he has always been there to pick up the piece’s no matter what mistakes I made or trouble I got into.  He in turn has driven me to distraction at times, but that has never stopped me loving him. He has been the best granddad the boys could ever have asked for and loved my step daughter’s Amberleigh and Tammy as much as his own grandchildren. He was so pleased to become a great granddad to Ambers little boy Darren born on New Year’s day this year, and I’m so thankful he got to meet him. My dad has worn my mum’s wedding ring around his neck since she passed away 10 years ago and now they are finally together again. I don’t know how I would have got through today without the help of good friends lovely messages and thanks to  Michael Wass and Vampette Caz Smith who looked after the boys today while we went to the hospital, and the support from my better half,  Allan who was with me holding my hand as we sat with my dad while he slipped away to join my mum. Thanks to everyone who has offered support and sympathy you are the best and I love you all. Dad we are going to miss you but I couldn’t bare to see you in pain for any longer. I will always love you.

A Five Minute walk to Milton and a step back in time.

I have lived surrounding Milton Regis on and off since we first moved to the area when I was about 7 years old..  and in the whole time I had never ever been inside the court-house…….. I have always loved Milton as a village and the look of the historic buildings.. and I admit over the years It has got rather run down but the post office and Hall were always the most majestic buildings there… The post office is no longer a post-office but the building is still there and has been for 300/400 years..


I must find out one day

I have always been fascinated by history especially local history.. I don’t think the majority of people who live near Milton appreciate the history of the village  I used to live in Periwinkle close which was named after a stream and watermill…

Anyway back to Milton High street.. There has always been the court-house there and as I said I had never been inside it……….  and by the time I thought about going it had shut to the public 😦  as was slowly going into disrepair.  Fast-forward and now there is a group of lovely people who decided that the hall was worth saving and formed Friends of Milton Regis Court Hall.  and they had an open day this weekend……….  two days the hall was open again to the public so we decided to walk there with the boys… took us a whole five mins to get there as we cut across the rec.

thisismiltonregis  005

I remember being told about the mammoth tusk by someone else years ago and was pleased to see it was still there as that is what appealed to the boys the most I think.

I have to say if I didn’t have so much going on in my life at the moment and volunteering with so many organisations I would be tempted to join the cause…   Maybe at a later date I or should I say we will become active however we will take out a family membership next time I speak to one of the friends as she also chairs on the Country Park Committee we are members of….

Anyway  the kids loved it… so did we…….  and of course I took lots of Pictures….

PicMonkey Collage