Having a giggle on a facebook DIY group

Working on the theory the majority of people are on facebook or know someone who is, and if you are on a group the majority of them are serious and lacking in a sense of humour, and DIY groups are no exception, take away the glitter posts and half the group’s posts vanish.  Today I decided to lighten the atmosphere up a bit and posted a joke picture.  some of the comments were classic.   Some really got into the swing of it and others, actually believed it, and there is always that one killjoy who has seen it before and instead of scrolling on by, has to have a say 😆  I have blacked out all profile pictures and names. to protect the innocent and the stupid lol 

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A bit of humour to brighten your day!!

 

When God created Adam and Eve,

He said: I only have two gifts:

One is the art of peeing standing …

And then Adam stepped forward and shouted:

ME!, ME!, ME!,

I would love it please … Lord, please, please!

Look, it will make my life substantially easier.

Eve nodded, and said those things did not matter to her.

Then God gave Adam the gift and he began to shout for joy.

He ran through the garden of Eden and used it to wet all the trees and

bushes, ran down the beach making drawings with his pee in the sand …

Well, he would not stop showing off.

God and Eve watched the man crazy with happiness and Eve asked God:

What is the other gift? ‘

God answered:

Eve,….. A brain … and it is for you …!

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Goddess in the kitchen/Whore in the bedroom ~ Facebook strikes again..

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I love Facebook, contrary to a lot of people’s belief’s I don’t actually spend hours on it.. .

I no longer play any games, I just don’t have the time or the patience any more.

My chat is turned off because I’m basically an unsociable cow …… Well off to everyone except one person

The real reason is I have a modest friends list of about 500/600  depending on how many I have offended at the time..

and I don’t have time to keep replying to people who pop up on chat and I don’t want to seem unsociable so If I remember unsociable all the time,

I am not being called an ignorant cow for not replying….  unsociable cow seems so much nicer lol

So If I don’t chat, I don’t play games what do I do on Facebook you ask,

Well I do talk to some friends via some “Secret Groups” I am a member of about 4  that I use on a regular basis

and I post stupid status updates… usually its random crap that comes to mind or I may see something that I think is highly amusing and worth stealing and posting.

and I post pictures…….. not your every day pictures but usually ones that I class as really funny

These pictures are posted on groups, usually with funny  names and I was sitting there tonight seeing pictures posted thinking I could do that.. I could start a page where I post silly pictures..  and they get reposted..

and so I have created a page… I guess its my alter ego really…. or will be as the only person who likes it is me but then it is only a few hours old and I haven’t publicised it like some shamelessly promote pages.
However feel free to like my page and share a pic or add them… its open at the moment…..   It will be interesting to see if this little project gets off the air..

What is my page called……..

Goddess in the kitchen/Whore in the bedroom

Dont ask me why It just seemed rather appropriate I guess and no one else as a page called the same, well I don’t think they do..

here is the link if you are interested..

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Goddess-in-the-kitchenWhore-in-the-bedroom/154974134652324

I need all the help I can get honest lol

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When I’m talking bollocks because I have nothing really that I can blog about……… Problem Solved!

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There are times when I really feel like updating my blog yet no matter how much I try to squeeze a post out of my head I still come up with nothing.

Those that know me know that I can come up with bollocks most of the time anyway.

The one reason why I always keep a notebook app on my phone is so wherever I go I can write down things that happen, events or other things that may just prop up.

Ideas usually come up when I’m drinking coffee in some cafe with the girls or even if I’m out and sitting on my own, especially when I can hear some interesting conversation around me,It’s not that I am nosey its just some people must want the whole world to overhear when they have a conversation.

Things pop into my head when I’m lining up in the local shop or waiting for my turn in Asda’s or in the queue for the cash machine, the dentist’s, or waiting in the local memorial hospital waiting usually for Ali’s eye appointments or at the hospital for his paediatric appointments to do with his autism.

Things slid through my mind and I think I could blog about that… this is why my blog is probably the most mish mash assorted blog you have ever seen…

one day I am ranting the next talking total bollocks… I do see things online that amuse me and I think oh I must mention about that. Or there are jokes I see and I think they have to be shared I know not everyone has the same sense of humour I have. Especially when I see things like a good joke or the hilarious ebay posting that I have blogged about in the past.. I just have to share……..

 

Or of course I need to rant and rave because I know if I did it in real life I would probably end up killing someone or being sectioned under the mental health act.

You should consider yourself lucky really because about 99% of what goes through my brain or I have jotted down on my trusty app never reaches the keyboard….. I never seem to find enough time to blog… even on days when I have nothing to do ……….

 

Anyway I have promised myself I will try to carry on and blog about the many various subjects that come to mind,  in the future
Just to carry on confusing you really and I was wondering what diversity of crap I could post about when I was surfing for something totally none related to blogging and I saw this bloggers list and thought

yeah what the hell I will give it a go.

It’s similar to the 30 day challenges but you just post in order at any time when you have no idea what to blog about………

or can’t blog about what you are really thinking and need some other idea’s instead

(in my case quite often)

oh and there are 50 things not 30…

This may take me years to finish… or 51 days you never know….. 😉

 

So here is the list……. And what you can expect at  any time in the future…..

 

 

1. Do you have any phobias? what thing do you fear most?

 

2. Describe your first date/first kiss. Hmm.. did you see stars or you just felt gross?

 

3. What is scariest experience you had?

 

4. What kind of games did you play as a kid?

 

5. What do you miss most about your childhood?

 

6. What kind of child where you? Shy? A bully? Popular? Loner? Stubborn? …

 

7. What gift would you give the person you “don’t like”

 

8. Who was your celebrity crush during your teens?

 

9. What outfit did you wear before that you swore you’d never wear again? If you have photos and the right amount of courage, then post it!

 

10. Do you have any regrets? Whats the biggest mistake you ever made?

 

12. What’s the weirdest/hardest/funniest job you ever had?

 

13. What’s the most embarrassing thing that happened to you?

 

14. What’s your wildest dream?

 

15. who is the worst neighbour you have ever had

 

16. Your dream gadgets..

 

17. Top 5 places you want to visit in your lifetime.

 

18. Top — movies you’d watched over and over again. OR if you are in the mood to be negative – movies you wish you didn’t watch.

 

19. Top 5/10 songs that makes you want to wish for ear plug..

 

20. List down your beauty product must-haves.

 

21. What’s inside your closet? Talk about your fashion style..

 

22. what season do you like best?

 

23. What’s always in your grocery trolley

 

24. List your favourite social network website

 

25. Have invisibility and teleportation at will or the ability to read minds and fly at will??

 

26. 5 things you want to change in yourself..

 

27. What was the last book you read?

 

28. Review any blog you find interesting.

 

29. Like eating out? Review a restaurant.

 

30. Talk about the last hotel you stayed in or holiday you had.

 

31. Review a product. Gadgets, beauty products, household products, whatever you fancy.

 

32. Review a TV show, a soap or a movie.

 

33. Talk about an excellent service you got..

 

34. Tell your readers how you got into blogging..

 

35. How did blogging change/influence you?

 

36. Have any special skills or hobbies?

 

37. What trait do you find the most annoying about people.

 

38. Check out the latest weird / odd news and talk about it.

 

39. Youtube, MetaCafe, Veoh etc offers a lot of interesting videos. Embed one and tell why you chose that one.

 

40. check the latest news and state your opinion about it.

 

41. Post something funny. A cartoon. A funny photo.Funny lists..

 

42. Find a quote. Share your thoughts.

 

43. What is the one word you can never remember how to spell…

 

44. What are the things you won’t write about in detail? Why you won’t blog about this topics?

 

Now is your chance to get back at them..I would suggest not naming them 😛 I’ve done this and somehow it got something off my chest.. lol!

 

45. Who was that teacher at school who made you almost made you pee in your pants.

 

46. The school bully who took pleasure in pulling your pigtails, or stealing your lunch money

 

47. That ugly boyfriend/girlfriend who left you for someone else.

 

48. the Nosiest neighbour you have ever had and did you actually do anything to wind them up

 

49. that obnoxious co-worker who keeps grabbing credit for your work.

 

50. What was the funniest/nastiest/most memorable prank you ever pulled on someone?

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Deck the Halls with C***s and W*****s

You know once in a while you see something on tv and you know its wrong but you cant help but piss yourself laughing 🙄 Especially when she started singing Deck the Halls with Cunts and Wankers!

Sorry but it just appealed to my warped sense of humour!!!